- Hilary, you're going to be in med school for a long time. You need to make your gchat away messages more interesting. None of this "studying." Try "studying... WITH NO PANTS ON!"
- Did body pump today for the first time. Just now, I could barely lift my arm to brush my teeth. I had to kneel in the bathroom floor and prop my elbows up on the sink in order to accomplish the task. YES. Tomorrow, I double up on whey.
- Room is almost clean. Not "looks clean on surface," but "if you open the drawers it is clear that there is a rhyme and reason to their contents" clean.
- I'm a lot better at helping my 8th graders with math than I was at doing the math in 8th grade.
- My shoulder might pop out of its socket. Oh well.
- You know how sometimes you stare at a hot guy's muscles for motivation at the gym? I have several go-to men for this. (SIDENOTE: Unlike most women, I actually WANT to get jacked. None of this "oh, I don't want to be too bulky." Bring it on. Bulk = I can kick your ass in boxing). But anyway, there are a few men I regularly stare at to give me motivation to complete my last set of whatevers. I don't talk to them. They might as well not have names. They are purely objects, inspirational brawn if you will. Today, one of them spoke to me and I realized HOLY SHIT YOU ARE SO GAY. I'm one of the most open-minded people I know, so clearly I have no problem with this, but how can I not have noticed? Does gaydar not transfer to the gym?
- I told my mom about this and she said the problem is that I stare at American men. She has a whole posse of 30-something body-builders at the gym who ADORE her. "Foreign men are much easier to read, Leah" she says. They love her though. Sometimes, I want to go to Gold's just to see roided-up body-builders who can't put their arms down by their sides follow around my 61-year-old mother. Sven is her favorite spotter. Oh, life.
- News from the teacher FB account: My students have begun changing their names on facebook. It would be as if I decided to make my last name "Deng" because my BFFL's last name is Deng, or if I decided to make my last name "DiCaprio" because my life goal is to have ridiculous sex with him. However, I just get plain confused, think their accounts have been hacked, and frantically defriend them. They are offended of course, but how was I supposed to know that that whole mess of last names was you? Your photograph is of Justin Bieber. You have NO identifying information on your profile, except that you love Drake, but that's about as helpful as stating that you're a middle-school student: NOT AT ALL.
- PS: I knew Drake when he was Jimmy on Degrassi.
- Where did all my ties go? Father dearest gave me plenty... IE: all the fruity ones Mom gave him that he didn't want to be required to wear. Out of sight, out of mind. Where did they go though? Has it been that long since a corporate hoes / ceos / dirty schoolgirl / sketchy professor / generic excuse to wear pleated skirts and ties and look like a general whore party? Maybe we should throw one, for old time's sake. Hmmm... *wheels turning*
Love you all--- MC
No comments:
Post a Comment