PART 1: ASS
One storyline in this episode is about a girl getting ass implants. Lexie Grey is worried that she's doing it for the wrong reasons, and the girl proceeds to convince her that she's doing it for the right reasons, for herself. However, this included a) a long speech from the girl telling Lexie she had a nice ass and b) a scene at the end of Mark checking out Lexie's ass, which, surprise, is awesome.
NOW I"M PISSED.
Dad, if you're reading this, I don't blame you, even though it is technically 100% your fault that I have no ass. I'm happy that I am essentially a female replica of you. I love having nice legs, boxer shoulders, and curly brown hair, all of which I got from you. But sometimes, like now, I just really wish I had an ass.
PART 2: WHY I WILL STOP WATCHING GREY'S
I have been there for the long haul, Grey's Anatomy. But so help me God Shonda, I will stop watching if you keep this shit up. Allow me to explain:
- I watched the first episode. I was 19, in my first apartment. It was Sunday night. I had just finished watching Desperate Housewives, which was an OK show back in the day, and then a new show came on. Usually, I turn off the TV. But in this case, I couldn't. The show began with a girl having a one-night stand. He asked her name, and she refused. The next day, it turned out he was her attending. She was an intern. At a hospital. SO GOOD. I was hooked.
- When Isaiah Washington revealed that he was a vicious homophobe, I still watched, even though Meredith had to cut Christina's wedding dress off of her, even though you waited WAY TOO LONG to get him off the show. If I ran a show, and one of my actors slung homophobic slurs at a fellow costar, I'd kill him off in the next episode. Fuck narrative arc.
- I watched when you killed off Denny the first time, and Izzy spent half a season crying on the floor of the bathroom.
- I watched during Izzygate, when you somehow thought it was a good idea to get George and Izzy together.
- I watched after Meredith "drowned," died, hung out with dead Denny, then came back to life, all to the tune of Snow Patrol ("Make This Go On Forever" was the one redeeming part of the episode).
- I watched when you, having realized your grave error in killing off Denny, brought him back as a symptom of Izzy's tumor.
- I watched when you had the worst episode ever and the hospital got shot up in the most slow, predictable, uninteresting way. The final ten minutes were good, though.
If you let Christina Yang quit, for real, I will stop watching. I will always love the times we've had, and the music you've introduced me to via the show. I will not regret the time I've spent discussing it with everyone I know. But you will lose me as a fan. For real. Permanently.
I am listening to "Make This Go On Forever" right now, for dramatic purposes.
The weight of water, the way you taught me to look past everything I had ever learned...
I'll close with something I tell my students when they are doing something stupid.
MAKE A GOOD CHOICE, SHONDA.
Love, Leah
