February Vacation Reflections

Prepare for some deep thoughts.

1. Every runner is a nerd. Every runner with a heart rate monitor is a nerd on steroids. This has got me thinking... How many calories does sex burn? Would it be appropriate to wear my heart rate monitor while having sex? I think for most people it would be, but then again, anyone sleeping with me is clearly okay with a whole lot of weird awesomeness...

2. Sparkles rock.

3. After 7 weeks without beer or distance running, I invited both back into my life. I didn't miss beer, or drinking, but OH MY SWEET GOD I've missed you, running shoes! Is there a Kayano fan club I can join? What marathon should I train for next? I saw a 90 dollar pair of subzero spandex in a store window today and I swear to God, I got turned on. If I never drink again, then I can spend all my drinking money on SPANDEX. 

4. Soon, there is going to be an Ikea in Somerville. On the weekend it opens, I vote we spend the first part of the day at Ikea, and the second part of the day doing a Somerville Irish pub crawl. We end at the Burren, where 40 year-old people will get inappropriately drunk and grab us as we scream along to the band onstage. Good plan? Yes. 

5. Dirty Disney Part 2 is happening the first weekend in April. Get ready. I may go as Lumier, the candlestick from Beauty and the Beast. I have a metallic gold bikini, and I'm going to go from there. I did not purchase the bikini for this party... I already owned it, obviously. The bottom was a captain's gift for cross-country senior year of HS. I'm pretty sure Hilary spearheaded that effort. I mean, you tell me Hil, was it your idea? I can't imagine anyone else calling J. Crew and requesting to have "Capt. Leah" embroidered on the crotch of a gold bikini bottom. 

6. I am a terrible human being who never visits people ever. It's awful. It began in college, because I stayed in Massachusetts the whole time. For 4 years, everyone visited me, especially because for the last 3, I had an apartment in downtown Boston, which is extremely handy when you're back from college and you need to get away from your parents. Then, I moved to... Brookline. Then... Boston (Brighton). Essentially, the last 12 years have consisted of everyone I love coming straight to me, and me never reciprocating. Well GET READY PEOPLE. I'm coming. Starting with you, Hilary. And if you have to study, I'll just go on a 15-mile run around Albany. I've never been to New York, aside from New York City. Gotta start somewhere. 

7. I have been known to buy shirts and wear them as dresses. It's part of the package when the package (me) has no torso. For once, I bought a dress, not a shirt, and 7 people asked me if I was wearing a shirt as a dress. After careful thought and consideration, I've decided to stop buying dresses at all, and wear only shirts-as-dresses from now on. I hope my father does not read this blog. Shit. Now that I typed that, he will. Bring on the witty one-liners about my clothing being too revealing. Sigh. Nostalgia. 

8. How I Met Your Mother is awesome.

9. The Hong Kong is awesome. I am speaking about the one in Faneuil specifically, but this applies to the one in Harvard Square as well, although not as much. If you've been there, I'm sure you've at some point made a comment like, "It's fun, but...." I know I have. But at the end of the night, when you're with good people, in a fun place full of scorpion bowls and people selling meat on a stick, you realize how amazing this place truly is. I haven't been there since my fake birthday in July after being motorboated by about 12 drag queens, and you know what? HONG KONG ROCKS. End of story. No buts.

10. In related news, Bell in Hand is going on my list of bars I only go to on nights before major Christian holidays.